It’s morningtime. The morning has come.
Before I go any further, I see you liked my Dancing on My Own performance on Smule and I must tell you that I am mortified. That was so bad. I should have made it private I didn’t think you’d think to look there. 😳🤦♀️
Now that I’ve gotten that out of the way, here’s what I wanted to say:
I think about your voice in the morning. Not the last morning I heard it.
The last morning I heard your voice, I asked you, “why are you doing this to me?” And you responded by asking, “why are you doing this to me?” And I just wanted to die right then and there. I still do, over that. I am so sorry. I don’t want to hurt you. I don’t now and I didn’t then.
I also know you didn’t want to hurt me during that conversation, though at the time I could not wrap my head around the fact that you were saying to me what you were saying. It did not even sound like you. It was so awful.
I’ve been considering why it is that I think being where we want and with whom we want is what makes us happy. Or, if you rather, what fulfills us. I’m using the words to mean more or less the same thing.
Anyway, I think it’s because when we are where we want to be and with whom we want to be with, we tend to be the most loving version of ourselves towards that person. And it feels good to be the most loving version of oneself.
I think that’s what it means for someone to bring out the best in us. I think that’s sort of what you mean when you say I brought out your authentic self. You meant it felt natural to love me. I made it easy to feel like the most loving version of yourself. Your true self.
That’s how I felt about you. It’s still how I feel about you. It’s a large part of why I continue to write in this blog. I come here to continue to be my most loving self by loving you, whether or not it’s reciprocated. You are what you love, and not what loves you back.
But, as I was saying before I went off on that long tangent, I think about your voice in the morning.
I think about how your voice sounded in the morning on every morning I ever heard it…
With the exception that last morning, when it sounded different.
Your voice runs through my body when I wake up in the morning. It feels wonderful.