Baby. If there was anything I could possibly do to take away your depression, I would do it in a heartbeat. Failing that, know that I love you. I am lying here wishing I would have held you harder today, last night, and the night before. You needed it, and I feel like I did not deliver. I am sorry.

I am also very sorry for my behavior and all the ugly crying I did. I want to keep it together for you. I want to take care of you. I don’t want you to have to deal with me the way I was. But you did. You answered my questions and I feel like I understand you much better now. That makes me happy.

I love you. You are my sweet companion. I want another night with you. I miss your arms around me. I miss touching you in the night. I miss the way you move in your sleep. Life is movement. The healthiest thing to do for your heart is to move with it. You deserve more than painful love.

You deserve to be found, not lost. Perhaps you will find yourself in the loss you feel. You have so much to offer this world. I would love to see your face the moment you realize that. Your handsome face.