I am concerned that if you knew how I feel after we say goodbye, you wouldn’t want to see me anymore. Not because you don’t desire me, but because you don’t want to hurt me. And saying goodbye hurts me. It is everything I can do to just get back inside my own apartment so that I can have privacy. So I can let my knees buckle. So I can full-on sob.

The reason I’m telling you this is because I agreed to be honest with you. I feel like it’s especially important to share the things I would otherwise keep to myself in order to perpetuate the relationship. I think if something is true and it is something that would make a difference to you, I ought to tell you, even if I think the difference may not be in my favor. Especially when the difference may not be in my favor.